this is going to be jumpy.

i dont deny i downplayed a lot of things lately. no chance scoffers, my life isnt dsyfunctional. i am nothing but exceedingly independent. sometimes i just like to behave immature to fool one or two. anyway, my mom is going to be discharged later in the day!

she asked me to check out the prices to 云南 because i've been going on and on about how beautiful that place might be. so i asked her what for.
she said,'lets go there for a holiday since they'll give me weeks of medical leave.'. and she was unbelievably serious about it. what a joker!

i'm still waiting for the pianist to ring me up so i can start living my life in jail. but at this moment i'm enjoying every single second of my holiday and worrying how miserably short this is.
i really want a new violin case this christmas. those rectangular ones you know you know. you dont? the zips of my own are going cranky because of those loose threads which are pouring out like a fountain. the pretty ones will easily cost a hundred. i'll make do with the 60-80s range. can someone pamper me a bit?


the dream i had last night was...i dont have an adjective for it. i already told you this is going to be jumpy.

i wish i had the courage to settle my issues out front rather than letting it enact in my dreams. but the ball isnt really on my court. since my partner doesnt want to play, i DONT want to walk over to that half the court, pick up the ball, smack back to my half of the court. it's so pointless. why not just dont play.

chalet tomorrow. hope it cheers me up a bit.

got to make a move now. :)