i'm moodless for everything and all i want is to move my ass back to hostel tonight though it's really the most unnecessary thing to do.

after 3 days i finally had a (not good enough) cry over it.

if you really treasured and loved a friend, you wouldnt have crossed those borders and made him/her suffer like i did (and still on heated pans). even if i had 10 (butter)flies swarming around me i wouldnt have given a single of them the slightest chance to rest on me if i didnt adore them at all. and if by any chance i unintentionally let one on me, or the fly made a forced landing that i didnt have the time to resist, i dont think i would have smacked it off me so heartlessly. i would have gone soft on it and showed it the other possibilities. afterall i'm in a stronger position over the fly given my size and the affection it has for me.
with great power comes great responsibility. sadly not everyone understands that.