too much trauma a day is hurting my old bones. i need lots of fresh air and breathing space, and i would appreciate if i grant myself the peace i had not too long back. i'm just wondering if you've ever been through mental-trauma rehearsals before. no? then discard the idea, cos it doesnt work. the real thing still swallows you like a tsunami. and here i am half drowning. sorry friends, especially to those i said bye too fast to tonight. i need this night alone, to do whatever healing i need. it takes a lot to recondition my stirred serenity, but i'm not saying it's impossible. if japan can pull itself out from rubble, why cant i.

thats it for me. i wont take another chance. i'm falling in love with the right things.